meaning behind the username.

It comes from a short little thing I wrote a long time ago.

this journey called life is a search.
to find out who you are and who you aren't.
to make mistakes and learn from them.
to live undefined and die a definition.

I will always be learning, always be growing, always adding to the definition that will never be complete until the day I die. I hope for that definition to be full of depth and surprises. A representation of a life lived well and fully. I know I have so much more to learn and to experience. That some of it will be good, and some of it will be bad. I am apprehensive about the future, and right now I would like nothing more than to be free of these heavy moments that define life and live light for a while. While this can not last for long I'm hoping for at least a semester and a summer's worth. This past year has been so draining and I don't think I can handle anything more for a bit. I guess I am living in a bit of dreamland, or I want to, very badly. I want to drift for a little bit and maybe I'll be able to hit reality soon, but right now I'm just not ready. I know I need to be, and I will be. It's all just a matter of time, and for now I need time to just breathe.

I will be posting as often as possible, maybe once a day.. once a month, if I keep up with it as much as my LiveJournal.. maybe never, haha. I'm going to make it a goal of mine to post a bit of my creative writing with each post; most of which I've never shown to anyone (mostly because I know it's awful). I'll probably run out soon because I don't write very often, and I haven't written very much. I will also start my bucket list, with each post I will think of one thing I should do before I 'kick the bucket'. This post's? Surfing. Haha, yes I know, it's a bit of a cliche type thing, but I think that would be the best kind of rush one could feel. I'll hopefully learn this summer, or sooner. We'll see what life has in store for me coming up.

One thing before I go, I remembered today why I don't watch/read the news. In Canada seven high school basketball players and their coach were driving home and hit a truck, killing them all. I can't imagine what their friends and family are going through right now, and I pray for them all. Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers, and I hope for them it will one day be okay, a hope I have for many, many others.

This wraps up the first post; thanks for reading.